Well, today's Valentines day, and surprise surprise, its a let down, as usual. I would have said it was a let down but it is only 8 pm therefore the day is not over and it could still be good, the optimism inside me refuses to die. After all, there is a large, if heart shaped, chocolate cake yet to be eaten. And I say let down but I didn't expect anything in the first place. I do like the idea of Valentine's day, because I like cheese, as I think I've mentioned before, and I am a hopeless romantic deep down, but it really does no favours to teens, or single adults I'm sure. Many people of my age are already very self conscious and lacking in confidence so to have a day where the world (well the media really, they're always to blame) makes you feel worthless and ugly for not being loved by anyone really just rubs salt in the fragile wounds of insecure teens. I'm probably coming across as a bit more depressed than I actually am, but Valentines day is not really a day of any significance, unlike other saint's days, and yet it has become a day, fuelled by peer pressure, that many people see as a mark of their worth, and for some, single, people it is really the last thing they need. Again I may sound uncharacteristically pessimistic; I'm sure there are good sides to this day and if I was "loved up" I'd see it as just an excuse to make more of a deal over showing that special person that I care for them.

The disappointing nature of today does not bode well for the rest of the week. I predicted this morning that this week would be unbelievably crap in comparison to last week and I can see it coming true if I don't do something about it soon. Last week was very good, the best in a while and really what I needed. It was always going to be good as we had booked tickets to see my beloved White Lies on Thursday since before Christmas. Although I knew it would be good, because the White Lies do not have it in them to be a let down, it turned out so much better than I though it would be. I am sounding pessimistic again, I think the last few weeks have made me a cynic, I can't let that continue. But after seeing them at possibly the most intimate gig I will ever get the honor of being at in my life, York Hall, I really wasn't expecting it to be so good. First of all we managed to get right to the barrier yet again. I personally loved my position as I was unbelievably close to Harry McVeigh but at the same time I was right in the line of sight of Jack, the drummer. Not only this but I am pretty sure Harry recognized us, well we have seen them four times now, and on all occasions we were right at the barrier basically and we saw them at a signing. On top of this he properly looks you in the eyes and when you sing the lyrics back at him he does this ridiculously cute smile and you just know he loves it. The cherry on the cake was that they finally played E.S.T, one of my favorites and I have been waiting to hear it for aaages!!! AND they played Unfinished Business and Holy Ghost, my day was made. Oh yeah, and we got the set list and another guitar pic. AND there were no annoying arses shoving between us, in fact the crowd behind us was practically dead and we didn't get so much as nudged throughout the entire night.

I also had two study afternoons last week, which considering I have never had one before was quite a way to start the proceedings. I even had a half price lunch out with the girlies in one of them which really was surprisingly good fun and surprisingly delicious. Then on Saturday it was my brothers birthday party which turned out to be pretty fun. I was really in the mood for dancing but I wasn't sure if anyone would but they did so it was good! I also managed to go from having done absolutely no textiles coursework to having half finished my jacket. So all in all it was a pretty good week.

Basically, I think I need to learn not to think weeks will be bad because they won't be as good as other events in my life. My life will probably be better when I live as if each week is a new opportunity to do great things and maybe it will be better than the week before, you never know. (I told you I liked cheese) I think I came up with this theory after seeing Muse in Wembley Stadium; this was, and remains, the best concert I have ever been to. I was worried that any future concert I would ever go to would be a massive let down since it would never be as good as that night. However, I just thought, if I mentally separate the Muse concert from all other concerts I can't compare them and it will be fair on the other bands. If you are following this then I think it is a pretty good analogy to life. If you were to live by comparisons I don't think you would every be truly happy.

As for Valentines day, I think music, and the dish of the day himself, Harry McVeigh will be my Valentine.


Lyric of the day: "I'm your absent Valentine" - Embrace, Chase & Status feat. White Lies

Magic Fingers

I have just recently started my exam module for my art A-Level, this time last week actually. Our new title is "Exploration and Discovery". I'm not going to lie, the first thing that popped into my head was pirates. I do like pirates, I held a Pirate themed night last summer, I like holding themed nights, my forte is Mexican nights. But after that initial thought I realised instantly why, the very next day, we had to go to the British Museum. Oh God, it's going to turn into such a cliche, I thought, drawing old pots and other so-called "discoveries". Yes, I know that technically these are discoveries as they were literally dug up from the ground but I really don't like taking the literal meaning from an art theme, and plus I'm not really into history, it's all about the future.

I began the trip by pointlessly wondering around the Egyptian and Greek sculpture rooms taking pictures of everything in case in turned out to be necessary. I couldn't have been less interested or less inspired. We were meant to do some drawings as well but I couldn't see any thing I produced form this day being any good. However, after a while I found the room with the mummies in it. I had the thought of looking at them on the back of my mind all morning and thought I'd indulge myself, although I really didn't want to have anything to do with them in my art book. It was here I saw this skeleton and, a bit morbid I know, a corpse which, despite being hundreds, maybe thousands, of years old, still had flesh and hair. Thinking I'd hit the jackpot I started sketching them.

It was then that a horde of primary school kids stormed and shoved right past me, interrupting my tranquil sketching time and blocking my view. Typical, I thought, until one by one the kids noticed what I was doing. Then the awestruck gasps began. (yeah, not to blow my own horn or anything) Then this one little girl asked me if I had magic fingers! Thinking she was being nice about my drawing I modestly admitted that I am no magician, just insanely good at drawing. I realized immediately that I had just missed the perfect opportunity to manipulate the whole class of kids that I was, in fact, magical. Looking back at my drawing I realized then why the girl thought I was magic; I was holding a tiny piece of charcoal between my fingers, so small you couldn't see it, and as I moved it across the page, marking it with charcoal she must has thought my fingers were just making it appear, as if by magic. Hmmm, I wonder who else I can fool with this...

That was just about the best part of that trip, unfortunately I feel myself being sucked into the black hole of cliched artwork. We are being made to work on from our trip and since the only thing to see there was ancient artifacts and old pots it seems that this is what I will be doing. Oh well, if it gets you the grades.
I seriously cannot wait for art foundation.

In other news there have been no musician sightings this week, so far. Tomorrow I am seeing the White Lies though!  You never know, I may finally get my photo...

Lyric of the Day: "Controlling my feelings for too long...pushing us into self destruction" - Showbiz, Muse

So it turns out I am not 100% free from maths, yet. After being blissfully unaware of what was to come I spent little just under a week, which was actually only about one maths lesson due to my interviews, enjoying free periods in place of my maths lessons. Then, the rude awakening came in the form of my maths teacher approaching me one morning before maths telling me that I still had to attend the lessons in case I failed the exam and had to re-take it. How pessimistic can you get? Well I had decided that I didn't need maths anyway for an art foundation so didn't really care if I failed. But, my inner (well maybe not-so-inner) goody-two-shoes prevailed, and the promise of EMA, and I reluctantly went to maths. How was I ever going to finish my art and textiles coursework now? However, my mini-drama didn't last long as our protesting in the maths lesson, preventing the people who didn't drop maths from learning, forced our teacher into negotiating free periods with us and I can now FINALLY say that I am free from maths.  

I heard back from Kingston the other day. I received an email which very kindly stated in capital letters on the subject of the email "Reject". How nice. I didn't even have to open the email, so considerate. This may seem like a bad loser type thing to say but I didn't even really like the place anyway. Seriously, what kind of University locks the building on the day of an open day so you can't see inside?

On the extremely bright side, I head back from Ravensbourne, my top choice, today. I was offered a place!!! Now I just need to sort out some from of transport, it is possible that I may spend at least 3 hours a day commuting, either that or pay un-holy sums of money for accommodation in central London. I think my final decision will be made after I go to the Bucks New Uni open day.

It has come to my attention that my blogs are getting a little wordy and since it is meant to be my journey to becoming a fashion designer I should really start posting some more of my work. So here is my A2 art coursework final piece (no where near finished mind you). I made it by sewing and weaving together a selection of dyed tissue paper, melted plastic bags and papier-mached newspaper which I then mono printed over. Its part of my recycling project. I have got so much more to add to it and we're technically meant to be finished the module now. Yeah. Now you see why I need all my free periods for art.

Lyric of the Day: "And I can tell just what you want, you don't want to be alone" - What You Know, Two Door Cinema Club